The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)

Sorry its been so long since my last entry, been real busy and haven't even had much of a chance to watch any movies at all. I did watch the classic original on Halloween and it was an unusually enjoyable experience... in a demented sort of way.

This is horror movie making at its most basic, most raw, and most effective. The grainy film, the demented family, the creepy on location sets, the young women with perky breasts in tiny halter tops and short shorts, the ill-fated road trip, and of course leather face. The ultimate B-rate 70's horror flick.

I have to admit that it is uncomfortable to watch because you feel guilty for enjoying your time watching such horror, however, it is not a bloody gore fest you'd expect. It is what it suggested by the scenes on screen that is the most demented. But it is so effectively made at all levels that it is horrifying.

TCM is at first just your better then average 70's slasher movie with young people getting murdered one by one followed by a chase scene where the damsel in distress screams and runs but can never quite get away from the bad guy... (at least leather face looks like he's running fast in most the other movies he is walking slow and she still can't outrun him!). Act 1, as I described, is a stereotypical horror movie, however it is better then most in presenting its horror cliches. However it is during Act 2, the dinner scene, where TCM finds its heart, so to speak, and becomes a classic. It is a scene that is painful to watch because it is brutally long and perfectly done to horrify your senses. It just keeps going and going and you just want it to end, yet you can't look away. I found on second viewing my reaction was not to cover my eyes or get sick, but to laugh because it is upsurd that civilized human being wrote this scene, then filmed it, then edited it, and produced it for other civilized human beings rent and watch all for the sake of entertainment. Yet entertaining it is! A raucous, demented, horrifying, hilarious, and outstanding piece of horror film making... a must see for horror movie fans, as well as fans of the craft of filmmaking.

" Look what your brother did to the door. Ain't he got no pride in his home."

3 out of 5 --> overall
4.5 out of 5 --> within its genre

( I felt two seperate rating were necessary as a cop out because it most deffinately is not a movie for everyone so I couldn't bring myself to giving a high recommendation, but for the effectiveness of conveying what it is trying to convey, however demented, there are few other horror movies that rival it )

Layer Cake (2004)

I really enjoyed this British film about burglary, arms running, and organized crime but there are a couple of things you need to know going in.

1) When I say British, I mean hard core tea drinking wankers who blast out the cheery-ohs like Austin Powers on speed. Basically, I spent the first 15 minutes only understanding the word fuck which for some reason always comes out in slow motion. Eventually, I got used to the cheeky sound--shine yor shooz guv'nah?

2) Get out your pencils and paper because the plot thickens and then multiplies like gremlins in a swiming pool. I kinda pride myself on being able to keep up with most plots but I gave up on this one. Honestly, I need to go back and catch it again which isn't a bad thing.

3 stars out of 5

Higher Ground (2005)

Warren Miller's newest installment is as classic as the legend's smooth narration. "Higher Ground" shows off some of the premier extreme winter sports across the globe. A lot of the coverage is of skiing and snowboarding but with some other crazy things thrown in to break up the 90 minutes.

I've seen Miller's previous films on TV or HBO but this year I went to a theater showing in downtown Denver. Maybe event is a better way to describe the pumped up atmosphere as powder-heads from around the area gathered to watch the show and enter the raffle. During the show the music absolutely pounded and people whooped and whistled especially during big crashes and wipe-outs.

While I didn't win the heli-ski trip to Portio, Chile I did get a free lift ticket to Copper Mountain and had a great time. If you get a chance to catch the Warren Miller tour, go for it!

3.5 stars out of 5

Flying Spaghetti Monster

This has nothing to do with movies but I felt it important enough to need a soap box--a little soap box that I like to refer to as Armageddon Blows. The Word of the Flying Spaghetti Monster really starting spreading after the Kansas School Board decided that evolution shouldn't be the only thing studied in science class. The alternative is called Intelligent Design, maybe you've heard of it but if not, it basically said that evolution is not responsible for the Earth as we know it but god's master plan. Keep in mind "ID" proponents insist that this has nothing to do with faith and is strictly scientific and can be supported by fact. I would be a fool to try and describe the new 3rd alternative, Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, when you can simply click on the link below.

http://www.venganza.org

Please drop AB a line about your thoughts on FSM, pro or con. Until then my stance will remain neutral.

Bottle Rocket (1996)

Owen and Luke Wilson make their film debut an instant classic. The movie follows Owen, Luke, and Bob Musgrave through a wacky introduction into the seedy underworld of organized crime. Amazingly, this is also Wes Anderson's directoral debut which he co-wrote with Owen. I think this film works as good if not better then some of his better known films, "The Royal Tenebaums" or "The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou". Don't get me wrong, I'm a big fan of "The Royal Tenebaums" and especially "Rushmore" which is why I put "Bottle Rocket" on my list in the first place. I just couldn't believe how much of a sleeper it is. I watched it on my laptop in the Salt Lake City airport and couldn't stop from cracking up. Much like Wes's other works, this film isn't for everyone but if any of the above made you chuckle then expect the same from "Bottle Rocket". Drop me a comment after you see it.

"This is my business manager, Row Boat" - Mr. Henry

4.5 stars out of 5

Closer (2004)

Adapted from a hit Broadway play, "Closer" follows the love lives of four people (Julie Roberts, Clive Owen, Jude Law, and Natalie Portman). Honestly, it must have taken me two weeks to finish this movie. I watched at least half in one sitting but had little interest to pick it back up again. I knew getting into it that it was kind of an arty flick but I was surprised at how unsatisfied I was at the end. I really didn't like anyone's performance despite really liking most of the actors. Don't get me wrong, watching Natalie Portman dance around in a g-string is never a waste of time but I just didn't find anyone to be believable--maybe they are too big for this kind of film. If you haven't seen this I would recommend you keep side stepping down the shelves.

"Lying is the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off" - Alice

2 stars out of 5